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KENPO GIRL

Dedicated to the enthusiastic martial artists in various systems, and how martial arts has affected our lives.

Valentina "Bullet" Shevchenko & Muay Thai

7/7/2017

18 Comments

 

A few months ago, I was asked by MMA Wreckage to cover an MMA seminar in Los Angeles.  

The seminar was hosted by the Paradise Warrior Retreat who traditionally brings in successful UFC fighters.  The goal of the seminar is to allow the fighters to discuss and show guests some of their training techniques.  
​This time they featured Muay Thai Specialists Valetina Shevchenko and her sister Antonina Shevchenko.


​Valentina Shevchenko has received quite a bit of publicity from her upcoming UFC title fight with Amanda Nunez, scheduled July 8th.  

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​The truth is, Valentina was a very successful fighter before her Mixed Martial Arts career.

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She has held several kickboxing and Muay Thai Championships and is highly regarded as one of the best female Muay Thai fighters in the world.  For her Mixed Martial Arts resume, she boasts a 2nd Dan and Master of Sports title in Taekwondo, a black belt in Judo, Master of Sports Muay Thai title, Master of Sports title in Boxing and finally a Master of Sports title in Kickboxing.
​

Her sister, Antonina Shevchenko is no slouch either.  

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Antonina with her WKC belt.


​Antonina is a 3x IFMA Muay Thai Champion and recently won the WMC and Phoenix FC World Titles.  In 2016, she was a 10x World Champion and was awarded Fighter of the Year by Awakening Muay Thai Awards and has been undefeated in her MMA career.


​A close correlation has formed between Muay Thai and MMA

 Many MMA fighters either have experience in Muay Thai or have modeled their striking from Muay Thai.  However, it is the Modern style of Muay Thai that is contributing to the popularity in MMA.  Valentina explained the difference between Modern Muay Thai and Traditional Muay Thai.

She explained,
“Modern Muay Thai is the practical use of Tradition Muay Thai. It’s about technique, traditional Muay Thai uses more straight techniques and more fixed stands.  Not many combinations with hands, more one or two punches but every time very strong. The same with kicks, strong one low kick, middle kick or high kick. Good clinch and good elbows. Modern Muay Thai uses all the same, but in the same moment the fighter of Modern Muay Thai can have European boxing hands with many combinations, strong turning kicks which many use in taekwondo, the back fists, superman punches and more movements in the ring.”

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Pretty much...

Muay Thai is not by any means a new age martial art.

Muay Thai can be traced back to the 16th Century.  Essentially the exposure from MMA, kickboxing and training outside of Thailand has begun to modify Muay Thai.  When I asked Valentina, whether she felt the popularity of MMA has affected the Muay Thai community?

She explained,
“The Popularity of MMA is natural because MMA is a Universal Sport.  Popularity of MMA develops from real kinds of Martial Arts such as Muay Thai, because Muay Thai is the best sport of stand-up sports.  Many Athletes in MMA use Muay Thai successfully.”
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Valentina and Antonina leading in a kicking exercise. 


Unlike some systems that are cynical of non-indigenous practitioners...

Valentina reassures this does not apply to Muay Thai.  Valentina was born and raised in the USSR but currently lives in Lima, Peru.  I asked if she had ever been harassed about fighting in Muay Thai and not being Thai?

​Valentina says,
“If the athlete has real technique of Muay Thai then there is no difference what kind of nationality the athlete is and what country he or she is from.  Muay Thai is from Thailand but now Muay Thai is for the whole world. One world one muaythai.”


​Muay Thai has spread and come a long way since it was first created. ​

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​ The International Federation of Muay Thai Amateur also known as the IFMA was formed in 1993 and oversees the amateur Muay Thai compe
titions in 128 countries.  Only 20 years later, the International World Games Association would announce that Muay Thai would be part of the World Games 2017 in Wroclaw, Poland.  
​

Yet there is still one controversy surrounding Muay Thai that has the community divided.  

.  The debate of whether children should be allowed to study, train and compete in Muay Thai. Some opposed such as the Child Safety Promotion and Injury Prevention Research Centre, claim that Muay Thai style boxing like strikes and kickboxing style kicks to the head of young children could cause permanent brain damage or alter development in children.  The Child Safety Promotion and Injury Prevention Research Centre has urged the Muay Thai community to limit strikes to the head and in some circumstances prohibiting certain age groups from competing in full contact Muay Thai. ​I asked what her beliefs were on the children in Muay Thai situation?

She insists that,
“Muay Thai has ancient traditions, including child fights and trainings. And it is justified and correct because little children can learn Muay Thai safely. For the little children, their beginning of combat activity passes like games, just like in nature..."

"Tigers do not wait until their cubs grow to teach them hunting, otherwise they will be hungry and die."  

"And I think that is very cruel to children –to deprive them of the opportunity to learn fighting. Especially since now children can fight in good equipment and under the supervision of qualified trainers."
​

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Antonina teaching/coaching at the Paradise Warrior Retreat.

Valentina began her Martial Arts training at 5 years old.  Her kickboxing career began at 12 years old when she knocked out her opponent that was almost twice her age.  Needless to say, Valentina as a child was no stranger to Martial Arts or training.  

​She went into further explanation,
“When I just started to train in Taekwondo ITF, when competitions took place sometimes several hundred children (attended). In these years, we almost had not so good protection and had gloves thinner than MMA gloves now. But no serious injuries- maximum bruises. In that time, it was something to be proud of.  And all these children grew up healthy and good people.  They run, play and fight- it’s very natural for children. The more early you start to train and fight, the more better fighter in future."

I personally as a mother whose son competes in karate tournaments can say their safety is taken seriously.  My son Jared is 5 years old and I distinctly remember when he inquired about sparring the first words out of my Sifu’s mouth was, “well time to order his equipment.”


It is articulative and responsible athletes and Martial Artist like Valentina and Antonina that help create a clear understanding to Martial Arts we may only be familiar with through entertainment.  

As the MMA sport grows in popularity and exposes its audiences to different systems and styles of Martial Arts, we must remember the different Martial Arts exhibited are being applied in a sports and entertainment environment.  We should remember these Martial Arts have deep roots in cultures and civilizations not only as combative training but to help practitioners find an inner strength and inner growth.
 
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Valentina has developed an inner strength that pushes her to train and almost perfect her technique in her various disciplines.  It is this dedication and tenacity that Valentina has clearly based her MMA and Muay Thai career on.
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Me getting to meet and talk with Valentina, Antonina and their coach Pavel.

18 Comments

The proper way to gear up...

3/8/2017

9 Comments

 

As I travel and speak with different Martial Artists from different systems, the easiest topic of discussion has been work out gear.

​Some base their selection on price or brand and some prefer the bare necessities.  Personally, one day I might be on the mat in my PJs and the next I’m in full Kenpo regalia.  
​

I was surprised and slightly guarded when I was approached by Elite Sport who wanted to sponsor me and have me test their gear.

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I was hesitant, but they encouraged me to just try the equipment and the clothing, urging me to let the results speak for themselves.
​ 
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​So I found myself on their website trying to pick out what items I would try.  As I looked through the rash guards, gloves and bags it suddenly dawned on me that I might know what these items are but I had no idea how to determine the quality of any gear.
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​With the popularity in Martial Arts, especially MMA, on the rise there are many new brands and distributors popping up. ​


 While some consumers might be inclined to choose the first cool looking piece of gear they find, there’s much more to it than that.
 
Gear is meant to protect students while also helping to enhance their training or performance.  It is therefore crucial to pay to the attention to detail that goes into the gear.  These details are what attract not just customers but reviews from customers.  

Elite Sports has been pleased with their customer response and maintain,
“The response from our customers has been overwhelmingly positive, which is a huge source of pride for our design team and the company as a whole.”
​

So I selected my items and waited for them to arrive in the mail.  Yet I still questioned why gear would be such a necessity?

The truth is good gear doesn’t just enhance your training, but can ensure your safety.  Injuries are a huge risk for many MMA fighters not just in the ring but during training.  These injuries could include torn ligaments, dislocated joints, broken bones and possible concussions.  

It’s because of these potential injuries that Elite Sports stresses,
“Wearing no training equipment at all is a huge risk.”
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I don’t train at an MMA gym but my main aspiration for gear was to find gear, whether it was a pair of gloves, shorts or even a gi that would be good quality and a comfortable fit.  

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I just hoped my rash guard made me look this awesome.

 I tried the Elite Sports Rash Guard first.  When it arrived, I was a little skeptical as I pulled it out of its packaging.  I am by no means a “slender” woman.  I have a large bust and an hour glass figure.  The problem I’ve had with tops in the past is them riding up and showing bare mid-drift.   
​

I had a feeling I’d have the same problem with this rash guard.  

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ELITE SPORTS RASH GUARD LINK
I was also worried about it being too tight in the bust and not allowing me proper shoulder movement.  When I slipped it on, I was pleasantly surprised to find was their no-slip waist band.  This sucker wasn’t moving and I literally was like an enthusiastic child and began doing jump jacks and running around the mat trying to get it to ride up...
But it stayed put.  
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I faintly heard the hallelujah chorus in the background.

I was also surprised at the strong flexibility of the material.  It didn’t itch and it moved nicely with me.  Plus, I am able to wear it just as a top or under my gi and still maintain comfo
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While this might not sound like a big deal, its little things like this I don’t have to worry about when training.  Elite Sports explains, that when they make a set of gloves or a rash guard, it’s meant to be suitable for use; whether your goal is to go pro, live a healthier lifestyle or gaining valuable self-defense skills.
​
 Elite Sports motto is,
“Embrace The Pain.  At the end of the day, the gear you train in isn’t going to turn you into a superhuman. You have to put in the hours at the gym.  What we mean by that is strive to be the best and let the growing pains shape you.
 

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​When you visit the Elite Sports website you can clearly see their passion for what they do.  Consumers can see the lives and careers of their sponsored fighters on Team Elite.   Their website shows a unique page for each member of Team Elite to showcase their story.

The future is shaping up for Elite Sports...

Especially with a lot of their focus and passion in constantly improving their products. With their own manufacturing facility, they are able to make some of the most advanced gear on the market place.
​

To stay up with their latest news and merchandise be sure to follow them on their social media.  Also watch Kenpo Girl’s social media for my photos and videos of me testing their products.

Elite Sports Website
9 Comments

Jennifer "Warrior" Waters vs. MMA skeptics

2/10/2017

6 Comments

 

Human beings have been competing since the beginning of time...

Whether it's for survival or skill there's a competitive nature in all of us. That competitive nature is most commonly exhibited now in sports and one of the fastest growing sports in modern-day time is Mixed Martial Arts or commonly called MMA.
MMA is the combination of various martial arts systems used in the competitive Arena to demonstrate an athlete’s skill by either knocking out or submitting one's opponent. The popularity of the sport his grown drastically over the years and while some are very enthusiastic others question the motives of the sport.

It has become a common belief that MMA is too violent of a sport and that it caters to an audience's need for blood and violence rather than technique or skill. ​


Some states in the past have even banned the sport all together. Back in 1996, the state of New York decided to ban the sport. It would be 20 years later in 2016 that New York with lift the ban and the first MMA fight would be held at the Madison Square Garden.
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Even with these achievements there are still Skeptics that question MMA.

Some claim that MMA has negative effects on the fighters for the rest of their lives.  Others are more concerned about the effects live professional fights might have on society; claiming that the image of MMA could influence violence in society especially amongst a younger audience.
​

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Probably shouldn't have let them watch Highlander before bed.

Before passing judgment on the sport, I felt that there needed to be a deeper understanding on professional MMA.

So I decided to speak with my friend Jennifer Waters.  Jennifer Waters is a 29 year old and from Augusta, GA.  She holds a 4th Dan in Tetu Shin Ryu Kempo Karate, 1st Dan in MMA, 1st Dan in Kempo-Jitsu, and is a 4th Stripe Blue Belt in RCJ Machado Jiu-Jitsu.  She owns and operates 2 Seigler's Karate Center locations with her family and is a 2x Kickboxing Champion.  She began her MMA career in 2016.
​

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Jennifer "Warrior" Waters after her first MMA fight in 2016.

Some Skeptics compare MMA to the Gladiator sport. However, I don't believe they truly understand what a gladiator sport is...

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Gladiator Sports
in ancient Roman times involved Armed men who competed against other gladiators as well as wild animals and incarcerated criminals.  These Competitions were life-or-death that were used to entertain the masses. 
​

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This is a gladiator sport... to help avoid confusion.

Jennifer believes that this Gladiator sport misconception comes from the early beginnings of MMA.  
She explains,
“The sport has grown so much from the early days of "No Holds Barred" fighting. And I can see why some people would say that it looks barbaric. Typically these people are not educated about the technical aspect of fighting.”


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​It’s possibly from these early unregulated beginnings that some naive spectators came to the conclusion that mixed martial arts fights were no more than glorified brawls.  But like any sports,  there has been an evolution over the years.  
Jennifer spells it out clearly,
“Honestly, that was 20 years ago. Just like the NFL has gone through rule changes, regulation enforcement, and a pattern of continuous improvements, the sport of MMA continues to do that also.”
​

Regulations have been created and enforced to not only help the reputation of the sport but most importantly to protect the fighters well being.

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Before a fighter can step into the ring they must pass physicals, eye exams and blood work.  Some promoters are even taking it to the next level.   
Jennifer explains,
“Many promoters also want to see some kind of fight footage before you step inside the cage. They want to know they are not putting a back street brawler out there with zero experience against someone with years of training.”
​

Boxing and kickboxing regulations call for a 10 second countdown when an opponent is knocked out. ​

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​To further insure a fighter’s safety, regulations in MMA eliminated the 10 count and placed more responsibility on the referees.  A referee will monitor the fighters not only for a fair fight but their state of mind and reaction time.  If the fighters well being is at risk for permanent or unrecoverable damage, they will stop the fight.  
Its because of these regulations that Jennifer says,
“Many people feel that MMA fighters suffer less traumatic brain injuries than boxers due to this increase of safety.
​

 Other skeptics have less concern for the fighters and more for the audience.  They assert that these fights are encouraging violence, particularly with youths.  With social media’s popularity, anyone can search the term fight and not only find MMA competitive fights but also street fights.  This is where the confusion sets in.  
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​To someone with no martial arts training the two could look the same, but in reality the trained MMA fighter has been training for years and is regulated.  
Jennifer clarified,
​“This really is no different than watching two kids swim a race in a swimming pool and then watching Michael Phelps swim for an Olympic gold medal. The activity is similar but definitely not the same. Real and successful MMA fighters will spend years and hours of training to perfect their craft just like any other professional athlete does.”
​

As an instructor Jennifer encourages her students to watch not only her fights but other fights as well.  She believes it gives them the opportunity to see their  instructor handle loss or defeat in a respectful and humble manner.  
​

I attended my first live professional fight back in December 2016.

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I’ll admit there was a little bit of apprehension lacing my excitement.  I had previously watched UFC fights on television but had never actually attended one.  I had absolutely no idea what to expect.  What I hoped to see was skilled fighters demonstrating mixtures of different systems and techniques and trying to find the perfect combination that would equal victory.  I wasn’t disappointed.  I found myself living vicariously through them, mentally applying my own training into understanding of what they were doing.  I was enthralled and entertained.
​

What left me unimpressed wasn’t the fighters…  it was the audience.  ​


​While many were in the same mind frame as myself, so many were the opposite.  When the fighters would reach a stalemate with either grappling or gauging reactions, many of the audience members would begin to boo.
​

It blew my mind.  


​Here were these amazing athletes showing their talent not just physically but intellectually, and they were being heckled.  
It made me start to wonder how much power or influence the audience might have over a fight?  Jennifer explained to me that like any sport, the amount of butts in seats will determine the future.  Some promoters are focused on selling tickets rather than the longevity of the sport.  
Jennifer believes,
“I think it will take people with vision in leadership to really promote the sport to a high level. This will mean that the integrity of the sport must be thought of in advance before its profitability.”

​If the focus falls primarily on money, then audiences would hold more power than they realize.  What audiences need to understand is not every fight might meet their expectations.  A lot of planning goes into creating a match-up but it doesn’t guarantee anything.
Jennifer reminds us,
​ “You have to remember when you are going to a fight that competitors are matched in skill level and style if possible, but sometimes opposite skill sets and the lack thereof can make a fight boring.”
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Jennifer's first MMA fight was anything but boring, it was considered the "Fight of the Night"


​When you attend a fight, always be prepared for some crowds to be somewhat uneducated of Martial Arts and MMA.  For beginners to Martial Arts, don’t let your limited experience keep you from watching and learning through exposure.  While many attend fights purely for the entertainment aspect of it, there is much to learn there as well.

Whether skeptics are gaining their opinions from the audience’s mood swings or on current regulations,  MMA continues to be one of the fastest growing professional sports in the World.  Whether it’s your cup of tea or not, MMA still remains one of the top popular venues to display martial arts competitively.  One of the greatest ways we grow as martial artists is through exposure.  Regardless of criticism, if you are intrigued or curious about attending a professional fight you should go and have an open mind but most importantly...
​

Have fun.


​That's exactly what I plan to do with my besties at UFC 209 in March.

Jennifer "Warrior" Waters next match will be April 8, 2017 for NFC in Greenville, SC.
​She can be found on Facebook @ Jennifer Waters or Instagram @jennifer_s_waters.
Jennifer "Warrior" Waters Facebook
6 Comments

Stephen Thompson & Carlos Condit Q&A with Kenpo Girl at UFC Seminar

5/15/2016

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​My parents enrolled me in a martial arts after school program when I was young ...

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They felt it was important for any woman to know how to defend herself.  It’s a belief I have carried into adulthood.  It was in my training that I learned techniques to escape basic attacks: punches, grabs, kicks ect.  I was very active with my dojo at the time but I never had the urge or desire to do anything competitive with it.  To be honest I never even sparred until my return to the mat as an adult.

Needless to say my experience with competitive martial arts is limited.  I’ve never paid to watch any fights, usually stumbling upon results or highlights on my Facebook feed, and discussing them with whoever brings it up around the Dojo water cooler. It’s not that I am against competitive fighting—I have just always felt knowing who the top ranking fighters are in UFC wouldn’t save my ass in a street fight.
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When I was asked to help promote/attend the grand opening of the UFC GYM in Northridge, CA and the Paradise Warriors Retreat UFC Seminar, I was surprised.  I didn’t know what to expect and I didn’t know what I would walk away with.  That’s even if I could walk away afterwards.
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After I consulted with a good friend of mine we decided to go just as spectators, the intent being to check out the UFC GYM (since it feels like they’re popping up everywhere) and secondly to meet and talk to some of the UFC fighters teaching at the seminar.


​When I and Ms. Z arrived at the gym we were pleasantly surprised to find that UFC GYMs are like martial arts versions of Chucky Cheese.  It was clear that this place was well stocked for any form of fitness training but was also equipped with a mat and their own cage.  
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Yes that's me playing hide and seek.

When we checked in for the seminar and looked over the schedule it screamed, “MMA FIGHTER IN ONE DAY!”  We had striking class with Stephen Thompson, BJJ Submission and attack from the Guard training with Arnoldo Maidana, Muay Thai & using elbows/knees to finish a fight by Carlos Condit and finishing the day off with finishing your opponent with strikes against the cage by Alan Jouban.
It sounded ruthless and I had been told the classes were for any age or level but I was skeptical.
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  1. Push drags: they never officially called it this but that’s what it was, applied to make your attack less readable.
  2.  Heal-Toe alignment: A proper stance was brought up by Ray Thompson about measuring your stance with what we call heal-toe alignment.
  3. Power principles: using body mass was brought up to add power to a strike.  It all refers back to our power principles of backup mass, torque and marriage of gravity.

I was proven wrong by the first class.  The striking class with Stephen “Wonderboy” Thompson and his dad/coach Ray Thompson was a pleasant surprise.  Here where two clearly experience instructors not only providing realistic drills but discussing the technique and theory behind each drill that was obviously Kempo based (and yes some of the students were kids and women).
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It was also an eye opener.  As I watched it became clear that very few students had any martial arts basis to go off of.  Some of the students didn’t even know what a proper fighting stance was.  The Thompson’s were introducing them to literally basics and principles such as...

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I could identify these basics because I train with them every day, but to the inexperienced martial artists they viewed it as a novelty.  I felt there was an important lesson for fighters whose training method is to pump iron and hit bags as hard as you can all day… 
There is technique in MMA.  It comes from the basis of whatever system you choose to start with.  You have to learn the basics and hone your technique otherwise you’re just another bozo jumping around in gym shorts.
After class I got a chance to talk to Stephen.  
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A funny history lesson: My Grandmaster Sifu Ed Parker Sr. was Elvis’s instructor and it was Elvis’s involvement in martial arts that inspired Ray Thompson to start martial arts. 

I have heard about the NFL lawsuits concerning concussions damaging the player’s brains.  You are not just getting slapped in the head during an MMA fight and there’s a very great possibility you’re going to get knocked out.  So I had to ask, “With the NFL in the middle of a lawsuit concerning concussions, are you concerned about any lasting damage from your fights?”

Stephen replied, “No, because of the way I move I don’t worry about it.  I see these guys, you can tell (they’re effected) by the way they talk but they get that way in the gym.  You have to train smart.  When we spar we work light, we work the body not the head.  You just have to train smart.”
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Training smart was something he had brought up in the class repeatedly even discussing his former injuries and how he listens to his body to determine work outs at times.  
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On top of his training for MMA, Stephen and his dad run a Martial Arts School called Upstate Karate.  Stephen is the head kid’s instructor.  I hadn’t envisioned an MMA fighter as being a kid’s instructor.  I’m an instructor at Double Dragon and know what kids gain from learning martial arts, but a part of me wanted to know if he had the same philosophy or if it would be different because of the competitive edge…  So I asked, “Some people believe that UFC and martial art are promoting violence in children.  What’s your response to that idea?”

Stephen didn’t even hesitate, explaining the importance of learning to defend yourself regardless of age and that it helps teach modesty and respect.  He also brought up bullying, that learning to defend yourself will deter bullies.
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Pretty much what all proper martial artist instructors have been saying since the beginning of time that no one wants to listen too.  Now at Upstate Karate they teach various styles of martial arts.  I have been somewhat confused about this in the past and I had read articles and rants online about learning too many systems and never mastering one.  “Some people feel that by doing MMA you aren’t mastering a system.  Your response?”

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I have to admit I was nervous about asking this question.  The last thing I wanted to do was piss this guy off but he was cool about it, “I have students that do karate, soccer, basketball…  They are good at them but they won’t be great because they’re not focusing on one.  It’s best to start (martial arts) at a young age, in one style and let it grow.”
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I can relate as an instructor.  The countless times a student missed class for a week because of a track tournament or even a fatigued student because of back to back practices; at times the parents seeming to be more concerned with the quantity instead of quality of sport activities.  I had a wonderful time talking to Stephen.  He appeared to be a genuine guy that enjoys not only doing martial arts but teaching it, even taking time during the seminar to help the younger kids in the class.  The complete opposite of what I expected.

We later watched the class by Carlos Condit ...

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​This ended up being pretty much a drill class.  Carlos introduced incorporating elbows into blast double take downs and double under clutches.  This was interesting to me because I had never heard of such things but as I watched the students you could tell that because they lacked the power principles most would have to try hard to take someone down or get pulverized in the process.  The main lesson I walked away with from Carlos was a comment he made that indirectly connected back to Stephen’s interview...

“The more wars (sparring) you have here (gym), the less you have out there.”

Carlos has a son and after class I asked him if they did martial arts together?
Carlos responded, “Yes my son’s been doing Jujitsu a few years.  He’s 6.  I don’t train him, I just play and wrestle around, let it be fun.”

There are many different systems of martial arts and at times I think parents get confused on what is what and which they should enroll their child in.  So I asked him for advice he would give parents thinking of enrolling in martial arts.

Carlos believes and advises, “Take out the competitive aspect and let them train and have fun.  When they have fun it allows them to make mistakes and grow.”
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I think in turn MMA has the potential to be no different from a singular martial art.  It really just depends on where you train and who you train with.  Unfortunately with the popularity growth of UFC I believe we will see more MMA versions on McDojos popping up.  Anyone who’s contemplating training in a MMA style should take their time to do their research and don’t be afraid to ask questions.  The trainers that enjoy the sport and know what they’re doing will welcome the questions because they have the knowledge to answer and are worth your time.
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IS ALL FAIR IN LOVE & WAR?

5/12/2016

2 Comments

 
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Is it fair to assume if martial artists spend so much time contemplating war, then love is going to come up eventually. ​

It’s natural to find ourselves attempting to merge our lives with mat time.  Yet, it always seems to become a tedious balancing act when it comes to mat time and matters of the heart. 
My Sifu once advised,
“Date someone in martial arts.”
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I’ve contemplated that statement, wondering if that really is the secret to a successful relationship.  As marital artists our equilibrium is naturally set to balance life and mat, but what happens when a third party becomes involved?   Haven’t we all heard the phrase,  

“You’re going to the dojo again?” ​

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Let's be honest, we've all been there and done that...

Dating someone in martial arts is an alluring concept.  I know multiple married couples that study together and have always viewed them as gold miners—the ones that struck it big.  But the grass is not always greener on the other side. 

I was visiting two of my married Kenpo friends; discussing sparring with them when I found out they never sparred together.  They practice techniques and forms together… but they didn’t spar.  They worried it would cause bad feelings and resentment between the two of them if one was either hit too hard or just right.  

​As a person that loves to spar, the idea of working techniques/forms and eliminating sparring sounded like hell to me; like building a relationship with someone and removing sex from the equation.

This entire time I had been day dreaming what it would be like to date a fellow martial artist—thinking how wonderful it would be to work out together and for someone to finally understand my passion for the art.
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Relationship goals... Or Urban Myth?

In reality it’s a naive concept.


No relationship is perfect and we tend to lose sight of what is important.  Finding a partner that supports us and respects us for who we are.  Every relationship is different and will have different needs.  If someone loves you for who you are (and you are a martial artist) then they should respect and love that part of you because it’s who you are. 

I’m no relationship expert but I am a martial artist and I hope my future partner recognizes from the sparring to Kenpo kisses (bruises) and the long mat hours are not only what I enjoy but they are making me a better person every day.

2 Comments

    Jesalyn Mae Harper

    Hello my name is Jesalyn.  I'm a divorced single mom and a karate addict...
    I am currently a 1st Brown belt in American Kenpo and a Junior Instructor at Double Dragon Kenpo Karate under JR Diaz, I am part of the Parker/Planas Lineage and study Karbaroan Eskrima with JR Diaz, under Guro Ed Planas

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